Spectres of my Mind

- Pragya Bhattacharjee

Sometimes i wish my words would not reverberate within me.

And as i flick open my eyes those words would just ricochet and leave.

Most times i realised, they are so ineffable i cannot even blame anyone else for not understanding.

For my mind knows to play tricks and my words that should have carried meaning now seem confusing.

Sometimes i fill myself so much with this world, all i want is to vomit "it" out and wish "it", the world, couldn't touch me anymore.

And those times when it gets so cold, i can't even blame anyone else for letting me slip.

For i know, even i did not help myself but space out and fail to take my leap!

Sometimes i feel an uncomfortable hurt from missing faceless strangers, you know the kind of vice-like hurt that lets you be but lets you too watch it gnaw at your soul?

Those times, i close my eyes and clutch my hands and repeat, "you are happy!you are enough!you are whole!"

Moments and days and years will pass by and i can never blame anyone for leaving.

For i've known since long, most will become my strangers with memories.

Albeit i still sometimes wish, some memories would not reverberate within me.

And as i flick open my eyes those memories would just ricochet and leave.